Nerd Church - The Basics of Self-Care

(Warning: this post includes frank discussions of a variety of mental health problems, including references to suicidal thoughts, and self-harm.)




May is Mental Health Month in the US, and 14th-20th May is Mental Health Awareness Week in the UK.

You've probably heard, at some point in the course of your internetage, the phrase 'self-care.'

Hopefully, what you've heard has been positive. Unfortunately, you may have heard others mocking people who practice self-care, or calling it selfish.

Self-care is not selfish. Self-care is vital for everyone.

Just as everyone has both mental and physical health, though not necessarily mental or physical health *problems,* likewise everyone can (and should) practice self-care as a way of keeping yourself as happy and healthy as possible.




Disclaimer time: I am not a medical or mental health professional. I'm a blogger with personal experiences of mental health problems - OK? OK








So, what is self-care?

Well, definitions vary. The only constant seems to be 'taking care of yourself' - which, y'know, duh.

But that, at its heart, is what it is. It's looking after yourself - no matter what that may entail.





As far as I'm concerned (and you can totally disagree - I don't mind!) the principles of self-care are these 2 simple points:

1. Stay alive.

2. Try to make your health and general wellbeing the highest level that is practical at this moment.

Physical self-care




Physical self-care can be reactive - a response to a problem, for example:

• staunching bleeding
• cleaning wounds
• applying bandages or plasters (band-aids to American folks)
• phoning an ambulance in emergency situations
• painkillers
• physiotherapy for muscles, joints, etc.

But self-care also covers the everyday stuff, such as:

• eating
• staying hydrated
• going to the toilet
• keeping clean

Mental Self-Care




This is even harder to define than physical self-care, but it starts with the same principles.

You need to stay alive - because yes, we need you in this world my dearest, dearest nerdlet! - and you need to be as well as you can be.

Mental health problems often put your physical health in jeopardy.









If you're finding it difficult to figure out what you need, try asking yourself these questions:

1. Am I physically safe, right now, this moment? If not, fix this before anything else.
2. Am I in immediate danger of hurting myself, right now (this includes addiction relapses)? If yes, remove yourself from the method you'd use, and get someone to talk to. Call them out from their room or phone them. I don't care what time of the day or night. GET HELP. If you feel you need it, phone an ambulance. NEVER be afraid to seek help - you are IMPORTANT.
3. Am I feeling an extreme low or having suicidal thoughts? If this is an immediate danger, see the above point. If not, try to lift your mood - do something you enjoy, watch cat videos, WHATEVER you need! If you feel like you need to talk to someone, call a friend or family member, or a helpline. There's a link to a list of helplines at the end of this post.
4. How much food do human beings need per day? Have I eaten this amount? If no, eat something. It doesn't have to be a lot, just eat one thing.
5. Have I washed my face/brushed my teeth/put on clean clothes today? If no, try to do so. If you don't manage it, it's not a failure. And I am so SUPER proud of you for even thinking about it!

If you ever feel totally overwhelmed, just take things back to basics. Start with physical safety, and work onwards from there.

If you can't figure out the solutions - it can be so difficult to think sometimes my dearest nerdlets, I know - just think about it carefully and logically. Simplify and then move on logically.

Self-care can also take forms which, to other people, might not seem to make much sense.

If you've been lucky enough in your life to not have to work at happiness and/or relaxation, then some of the things people do to achieve that may confuse you.

But - and this is important my nerdlets - DO NOT JUDGE other people.

Here are just some of the literally millions of little things that have saved my life:

• my cats
• my family and The Bestie
• Oliver Queen
• Judge Judy
• cupcakes - or any cake, really
• glitter
• cat videos
• crack fan videos
• The Wolf Gift by Anne Rice
• blogging
• watching butterflies
• the sound of owls outside my window
• my Ted Baker t-shirts
• My Chemical Romance
• Fall Out Boy
• Green Day (especially the song 'Still Breathing')
• reading - all types

None of these things have saved me on their own - but they all play a part, and most of them quite a big part - in keeping me going during the darkest times.




NEVER be ashamed of what YOU need.

You know what it is you need. As long as it's not hurting you or anyone else (and is like... legal,) then you have every right to it. YOU are important.

Of course, we should also def. remember that physical health and mental health affect each other.

You are one person. One whole, beautiful, breathtakingly unique, person. You need to take care of both your mental and physical health - it's uber-important! 

If you're struggling with ANYTHING emotionally or mentally my dear nerdlets, PLEASE get help.

There are also suicide prevention and/or mental health helplines you can use.

And, if you're in the UK, you can talk to The Samaritans at any time.

Do you have any self-care tips, my nerdlets? Talk to me! 💖💬

You can follow me on Twitter @CeeDoraReads, on Dora Reads @ BlogLovin, and on Google+. For more ways to support me, check out the Support Me page

Other posts like this:

• Nerd Church - Mental Health 101

• Nerd Church - 10 Self-Care Reminders For When You're Extra-Busy, or Working Extra-Hard

Last updated: 20th July 2018